Debra Trappen’s series continues with inspiration for getting back in touch with the work that lights you up and renews your motivation.
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Welcome to Lead with Fire, A Soulful Series for Real Estate Game-Changers. This is more than business advice — “Lead with Fire” is a transformative series created for the soulful, visionary humans in the real estate industry who are done with the old playbook and ready to redefine success on their own terms.
The secret to success isn’t doing more; it’s staying lit up.
There was a moment when I realized the cost of playing it small was slowly killing me from the inside out.
I was doing work I loved. My values, passion and purpose all aligned — check, check, check. The problem? The people I was working with had a different agenda.
They didn’t want all of me. They wanted the “palatable” version. They wanted to dull my voice, shrink my presence, and rework my vision into something … safer. Directionless, yet controlling. Hollow, yet somehow demanding.
I fought it. I kept showing up. Kept trying to make it work. Until one morning, I realized I had slipped from flow into force.
I was exhausted — physically, mentally and spiritually. The drama drained me. The lack of vision, combined with vanilla feedback, drained me. The pressure to contort and conform drained me.
And then — a spark. The moment I made the decision to leave, the light returned. The fire that had dimmed came roaring back. My energy returned because I returned to myself.
Energy is everything
In a world obsessed with productivity, most people are taught to manage their time. When you’re building a life and business rooted in purpose, managing your energy is the real flex.
Your energy is sacred. It’s your fuel, your currency, your lifeforce. When you know what drains it and how to protect it, you unlock a new level of freedom and power.
Let’s get real about energy drains
Sometimes, it’s obvious. Late nights. Back-to-back meetings. Hustle without rest.
Other times, the most significant energy leaks are more subtle:
- Saying yes when your intuition says no
- Silencing your voice to keep the peace
- Over-giving and under-receiving
- Staying in places you’ve outgrown
- Holding back to make others comfortable
Energy management is about alignment, not avoidance. It’s doing what matters most to you.
Reignite your fire: Your energy rituals
Just as drains exist, so do boosters. Protecting your fire means having daily practices that nourish you and bring you back into alignment.
Consider weaving these into your day
- Boundaries that honor your bandwidth
- Quiet time that reconnects you to your inner wisdom
- Movement that energizes instead of depletes
- Creative time that lights you up from the inside
- Soulful conversations that make you feel seen
Reflections journal prompts
Let’s bring this to life. Take a few moments to reflect and journal on the following:
- What (or who) is draining my energy the most lately? Why am I still giving it my time, attention or power?
- What consistently replenishes me, even in a busy season? How can I create more space for that nourishment?
- Where have I been forcing instead of flowing? What would shift if I softened or surrendered?
- What boundaries would protect my energy and creativity right now? What am I available for — and what am I lovingly releasing?
- How do I want to feel at the end of each day — and what needs to change to honor that? Let that feeling guide your choices and your calendar.
It’s not just self-care — it’s self-leadership
When you protect your energy, you protect your vision. You protect your ability to show up, to lead, to create. You shift from surviving to shining. From pushing through to moving in flow.
Your fire-protection invitation
This week, create your own daily energy reset ritual. Something simple. Sacred. Repeatable.
- A few minutes of breathwork
- A morning walk without your tech
- A midday dance break or soaking in the sunshine
- An end-of-day journaling session to release the day
Let it be yours.
Let it be enough.
Let it bring you back to yourself.
Mantra to Lead with Fire:
“My energy is sacred. I choose flow over force and create from alignment, not exhaustion.”
Next up in the Lead with Fire series: How to show up online without selling out
What’s your time, energy and talent really worth? In our next post, we’ll explore the power of saying no, standing in your values and owning your worth — no apologies, no discounts.
Debra Trappen is the founder of the Red Threads Collective, a sacred community for women entrepreneurs. Connect with her on Instagram and LinkedIn.
